Friday, September 30, 2016

Forgive our Sins



Grace, mercy and peace be unto you from God who is Creator, Christ and Comforter.  Amen
Today we end our four week look at Luke’s version of the Lord’s Prayer.  I hope you’ve found it helpful and interesting as we dove into this prayer that we pray each week – often without thinking about what it is that we say. 
And forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone indebted to us.  The first time I said this out loud, I tripped over the words!  For we ourselves forgive everyone indebted to us?  I highly doubt that!  As human beings we are by nature harborers of grudges!  Or, perhaps you’re a better human being than I am…
Forgiveness…it’s something we make our children practice from the time they are young.  “Say you’re sorry!  Forgive your _____ (you fill in the blank)!”  I know with our children, the practice was often very painful – for everyone!  And, after much cajoling and encouragement, the clipped, “Sorry” muttered under the breath, or through clenched teeth – never ever having to move the lips, or my absolute favorite soooo-rrrrr-eee, said dripping with sarcasm! 
The truth is, we force our children to practice this skill and keep at it long enough, so when it’s needed, as they grow, it will come back to them – we hope. 
So many times when we are waiting for someone to ask us for forgiveness, those intense feelings of hurt, abuse, betrayal are so intense and so deep that when the request for forgiveness comes – we would rather hold onto our feelings than receive the gift of forgiveness. 
And isn’t it true so often, that the person from whom we are awaiting the request for forgiveness, doesn’t even know that you’ve been hurt by what they said or did?  And then, we get angry that they aren’t bothered by whatever they did to offend us? 
And then, we get angry with ourselves that all this time later, that offense still bothers us?
And when we are the offender, we usually can sense the rift in the relationship and experience the strain between us and the other person.  How much courage does it take to ask, “What’s wrong?”  or “Have I done something to offend you?”  And then…to hang in there to hear that person out and to ask for forgiveness?  I think it takes a lot of courage; it is very hard for us to do, and hear! 
Martin Luther says in the Small Catechism: Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us.
What is this?orWhat does this mean?
We ask in this prayer that our heavenly Father would not regard our sins nor deny these petitions on their account, for we are worthy of nothing for which we ask, nor have we earned it. Instead we ask that God would give us all things by grace, for we daily sin much and indeed deserve only punishment. So, on the other hand, we, too, truly want to forgive heartily and to do good gladly to those who sin against us.[i]

Matthew’s version of this prayer uses two little words that pivot this whole petition…simple little words that make all the difference…AS WE.  As we forgive…it’s an ongoing action.  God’s forgiveness flows down into our being and we are forever grateful!  We’ve done nothing to deserve such forgiveness – it is truly a gift of God’s grace!  As we feel, deep in our being, that amazing, saving, creating forgiveness and can in that moment of pardon breathe even 1 breath free of our sins – we in turn pivot and let that forgiveness flow out from us to those who have offended us. 
Ongoing action from God, through me, to others. 
And, there is a flip side to this forgiveness issue.  When someone asks us for forgiveness, we are to give it just as freely as we receive forgiveness from God!  It’s pretty hard to do when the offense, the hurt is so real and so raw!  How do we do it?  Practice, practice, practice.   And realizing that when we hold onto our hurts, the only person who is affected is us! 
It only hurts you when you hang onto a grudge and makes your world smaller and smaller and smaller.
When I was a child, my mother was my molester.  She abused me repeatedly until I was eight years old.  I have this book on my bookshelf entitled, The Last Secret: Daughters …Abused by their Mothers, which I admit that I have not read yet.  It’s comforting to know it’s there and that I am not the only one who experienced such pain and betrayal. 
Now, here’s the kicker.  My mom asked for forgiveness almost ten years ago from my sisters and me.  It didn’t take any deep soul searching on my part to grant that forgiveness.  I love my mom.  I am forever grateful that she chose to carry me to term and give birth to me – for she didn’t have to.  I forgave her instantly and I will rally forever against the notion of “forgive and forget.”  For, you see, I will never forget what happened between us.  Yet, there is no bitterness, just sadness, over a relationship that would never be what I had hoped to have with my mom.  There are many other details that I’m leaving out, but what’s important this morning is that forgiveness was mine to grant, and I did. 
I am grateful that I did.  Our relationship mended somewhat in the seven years we had before her death three years ago. 
And, I realize that what happened to me made me into who I am today – a broken, forgiven, child of God, who eagerly reaches heavenward to receive the perfect forgiveness that comes only from our loving God.  And, who then, extends that forgiveness so joyfully received, to others whom I have offended. 
Perfect?  No way!  Just forgiven – like you! 
In the name of the Father, and of the Son +, and of the Holy Spirit.  Amen



[i] Small Catechism by Martin Luther.

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